It's 11pm...again.
The house is a mess...again, just like last night and the night before last.
There’s a long list of “to-do’s” still waiting to get done and not enough time in the day to complete all the tasks.
If you were to walk into my house right now you’d think a disaster hit it, and you’re right. But that disaster isn’t really a disaster at all. It’s a family of 4 with two little girls under the age of 3. Two fur balls we claim as family, and a husband and wife with two jobs each, struggling to fit everything into the 17 hours a day we are both awake.
If you were to walk into my kitchen you’d hardly see the island covered with items that haven’t made it to their places. You’d see the toddler snacks (animal crackers and chips) that were asked for 10x today and are now all over the living room floor. You’d see the McDonald’s sweet tea I brought my husband on my way home from errands. You’d see the “dinner” we had tonight on the stove, still needing to be put away and the array of baby items covering the whole west end of the countertop. You’d see the baby bottles still needing to be washed and the dishes in the sink still needing to be cleaned. You would also see the fridge, covered in 2-year-old artwork and photographs of loved ones. You’d see the kitchen table littered with mismatched socks as they wait for their twins to be found.
What you won’t see are the countless times our daughter has sat on the counter and watched us cook, or help with making cookies. You won’t see the cheesy smile she flashes when she sneaks a piece of candy and you won’t see the excitement of her getting to watch baby sissy take a bath beside the sink. You won’t see mommy singing and dancing in the kitchen along to K-LOVE while doing dishes and you won’t see daddy cleaning his guns he's proud of at the kitchen table.
Off to the garage and you can see the piles of laundry still needing to be done and the baby clothes that have been “fluffed” and “re-fluffed” 4x today. You'll see the mounds of towels from sopping up messes and the bedding that constantly needs to be washed from the dreaded "potting training" phase we're in.
What you won’t see is the shiny blue 1965 Mustang that is parked here in the summer months. That beautiful car is the reason this all exists. (Ask me the story sometime if you'd like.) You also won't see the chalk-art covered floor of drawings from our 2-year-old and tricylce she loves to ride.
The “office” is a sad excuse for one, but more or so a “catch-all” room. You’ll see another pile of laundry and a desk full of random things that haven’t found their home yet either. You’ll see my bible in the chair, calling my name, and my camera bags waiting for their next adventure. If you look closely at my top shelf, you’ll find a photograph of an old friend that was taken from this world too soon and a little square box he welded for me when we dated back in high school. You’ll also do the trinkets of weddings I've photographed and the small collection of cameras and photo products I am proud of.
What you won’t see is the highlighted bible scriptures I’ve been diving into with a wonderful moms group at church. You won’t see the countless hours of hard work I’ve put into my photography business. You also won’t see all the experiences I’ve had over the past year attending weddings of my own and second shooting, gaining amazing experience and making so many memories.
The bathroom is surprisingly clean for going through the potty training stage. You’ll see the coke shower curtain that has been tugged on too many times and now needs new hooks, the red step stool our toddler uses to wash her hands and brush her teeth. You can even see her new ponytails with strands of tulle and beads she’s currently obsessed with.
What you won’t see is the joy it brings me in the morning when she gets ready with mommy by putting on “makeup” and keeping me company on weekend mornings. You won’t see the 100’s of baths she’s taken with way too many bubbles and the countless smiles, laughter, and water spills all over the floor. You won’t see her daddy helping her get ready for bed by brushing her teeth and combing her hair. And you certainly won’t see me trying to snap a picture before the moment is gone. ;)
The dining room is alright I suppose. You’ll see the cubbies of shoes and outdoor accessories stuffed in the drawers. You’ll see the stitch backpack that turned into a toddler diaper bag that still needs to be packed for tomorrow. You'll notice some picture frames and a princess storybook that needs to be taped back together.
But what you won’t see is the “horsey” rides my husband and I have both given our daughter on this floor. You won’t hear the laughter of my baby girl as her daddy tickles her. And you won’t see the cute little shoes I get to pick up day in and day out and the countless snapshots I've taken as the girls walk out the door to head to the babysitters for the day.
A “home sweet home” pillow lays on the living room floor along with a quilt covered in chips and tiny Moana puzzle pieces. The coffee table has a complete "dinner" on it, calling my name. You’ll also see the “What’d You Expect” Book by Paul David Tripp on the desk in the corner that my husband and I have just started reading. You'll see our dog Harley that is probably looking at the mess and thinking the same thing we are. Haha
What you won’t see is the cuddle sessions on the couch, the multiple hours feeding our 4-month-old in the recliner, and the sight of my husband playing Battlefield 4 into the early hours of the morning. You won’t see our date night watching Supernatural and myself drooling over Dean winchester. You might see the blinds out German Shepherd tore through trying to get our mailman though. (Yup, I have the dog that hates the mailman of all people. Lol)
And finally, the bedroom. You can see the Owlet monitor that straps to my 4-month-old foot every night to give me peace of mind. You'll also see the crib that's nothing more than a clothes rack right now until Allie transfers over to it and out of her bassinet. You'll also see the poor rocking chair that a dear friend let me borrow that is just filled with blankets we don't have room for.
What you don’t see is my toddler jumping and singing “monkeys on the bed” every other day. You won’t see all the times she’s crawled into bed with us in the middle of the night and the way I loved to cuddle up next to her and held her close. You won’t see the plastic glow in the dark stars that cover our ceiling above our bed because let’s face it, I’m still a kid at heart. ;)
I know some of you are thinking, “oh my gosh, why would she show her messy house?” Or maybe some of you are thinking “messy!? That’s NOT messy!” Or maybe your thoughts are more along the lines of:
“Wow, my house looks almost the same! She doesn’t have a spotless house like I thought she did!?”
Guess what, most peoples homes look like this! And it's OKAY! Life is messy and we're all a little unorganized. We try to balance it all out and try to feed into the lies of "perfection" we see on social media and in magazines. We aren't defined by that. We are defined by who we are, not what we have, how clean our houses are, what cars we drive, what jobs we have or how well-dressed we are.
The bottom line is this: We should be and need to be PROUD of our messy homes. We're living life, one beautiful mess after another and making our most treasured memories.